"Giving Enough"

If you’re like me, then (a) you’ve been receiving a ton of donation requests, all of them worthy, and (b) even if you could give a large sum of money to every cause, it still would not feel like enough. The needs are that overwhelming right now. How do we do what we can and accept that it’s such a small part of what’s needed? I turn to Mother Teresa for wisdom and guidance.

If ever there was someone who faced down needs far beyond her capacity, it was the fiercely loving woman now known as Saint Teresa of Calcutta. Here’s some of what she had to say on the subject:

     “Not all of us can do great things. But we can do small things with great love.” 

     “It’s not how much we give but how much love we put into giving.” 

     "We ourselves feel that what we are doing is just a drop in the ocean. But the ocean would be less because of that missing drop.”

Of these sentiments, it’s the first that's most helpful for me right now; unless you’re on the front lines, perhaps that’s true for you, too. We know that the front line workers are heroes. To my mind, every essential worker is doing great things for the rest of us. But although I cannot do great things to help, I can do small things with great love, remembering that what I do is only a tiny part of all that is being done. And there are so many ways to do small things in addition to donating money, time, and goods to charities that can use them. 

Thanking essential workers in some way; calling family and friends; checking in on someone who lives alone; sending an e-mail, a handwritten note, or an electronic greeting card; stopping to visit a neighbor from a safe distance; offering to share what we have, including protective gear and needed household supplies; taking the time to remember and acknowledge birthdays and anniversaries; making masks for others. These are just some of the common and simple ways that we can give. What about sharing easy recipes with folks who might not have much experience cooking, or passing along recommendations for uplifting movies, books, music, or activities? Do you have some books, magazines, puzzles, or games to hand on to someone else who might enjoy them? Perhaps you can share arts and crafts supplies or sewing supplies, or find a way to share your advice and expertise for these activities.

There’s the ongoing work of preserving our democracy, helping those on the margins, and saving our planet. There are still petitions and initiatives to sign, letters to write, and calls to legislators that we can make. Voter registration efforts are still under way, and we can help. When We All Vote

Can you put something in your yard or in your window to cheer those who pass by your home? Carl and I recently came across a home that had a simple homemade easel (basically a cardboard box) on the front steps displaying a drawing that the owner had done. The sign next to it said that the drawing was a gift to the neighborhood and would regularly be replaced by new works. I’ve seen decorated trees, window signs, outdoor poetry postings, sidewalk chalk art, and “little libraries” repurposed to distribute canned goods. A neighbor has brought us a dahlia start for our garden and some delicious desserts. A friend gave me colored printer paper that she had cut to origami size so that I could make Soul Boxes with it. Soul Box Project A musician nephew offers virtual concerts from his home. Folks share their photographs, or upload their music. Our children help us with shopping, and our younger neighbor has run errands for us. Someone from our church invites us to send her homemade greeting cards, which she delivers to an assisted living center. Our niece reads children’s storybooks online once a week. Our yoga instructor offers open classes via Zoom. Elders offer wisdom, comfort, and hope to others. We all have something of value to share, whether tangible or not. We’re only limited by our imagination.

Every kindness matters. The grace and patience we’re extending to others — and to ourselves — at this hard time helps. We might not be able to save lives directly, on the front lines. But we can do so indirectly by staying home and practicing social distancing when we’re out and about. One of the most important ways we can give is to simply be present and pay attention when others need to speak. Actively listening to their stories and concerns is an act of loving kindness.

If you've been feeling any stress around "not doing enough,” see if you can find some reassurance in looking again at the good you are surely doing. And if you want to do more, let your creativity and the words of Saint Teresa of Calcutta help you find the other ways you want to give.

Until tomorrow, thank you for your generosity of spirit. Take good care, and be well.

Love,
Nancie/Mom/Mimi/Grandma

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